Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Zack Mammond : Valhalla and the Garden Hills

Zack Mammond : Valhalla and the Garden Hills

And so the saga continues…

Situated near the 50 yard line of the Metrodome in Minneapolis,
Minnesota, the Mighty Mammonds convened.

HACK MAMMOND directed  44 of the 4400 Wounded Warriors
to align the 44 Kegs in a straight line.  They were instructed
to put 22 Kegs spaced evenly on the 44 Yard Line.  HACK MAMMOND
then applauded the 44 Wounded Warriors for a job well done.
He then spoke to the crowd assembled on the field.

HACK MAMMOND è This is where we separate the TRUTH
from the lies.  Now, all the politicians from Minnesota, you will
be assembled on the South side of the 44 Yard line and your kegs
will be roped off with an ORANGE rope.  You will not be allowed
to speak to anyone on the North side of the orange rope.  You
will only be allowed to drink the ice cold Minnesota beer and
play your stupid pull tabs with each other.  And to make things
even more uncomfortable for you, all of your beer will be
served by Jesse Ventura. 
Now for all you Mammonds and the 4400 Wounded Warriors,
you will be situated on the North side of the 44 yard line with
the kegs that are roped off with Purple and Gold ropes.
You will be served by smiling Hooter servers and Viking

It was at this point that Zack Mammond interrupted HACK.

Zack Mammond ( Zygi Wilf ) è Umm, Mr HACK, we are under
strict rules that state we have a code where we only associate
with the colors Purple and Gold.  When you bring in the Orange
of the Hooters Servers, that is a conflict of interest and we would
have to shut you down according to our lawyers.

At these words, HACK MAMMOND looked at Zack and gave a
speech that went like this è

HACK MAMMOND è Were this all but for a silly Viking Stadium
then I would agree with you Zack Mammond.  But for some
reason unknown to you there is a NATIONAL DEBT problem and
a MINNESOTA DEBT problem going on that no one is addressing.
The man I mentioned before, Christo Strom, is going to come in
here and kick your ass from here to next Tuesday if you blow this.
The problem with America right now is too many people are
SIGNING EXCLUSIVE CONTRACTS with companies that don’t

give a rat’s ass.  This guy named CHRISTO ( that’s a Christ with
an O for Orange, take it or leave it!!!) will be teaching
National Debt Training
to a LUCKY 360,000 Women who will be implementing a

SYSTEM that operates on SOUND JUDGEMENT.  The 4500
Women who will be coming in here tomorrow are the 1st in
the nation to get exclusive training.  Now Zack Mammond
listen closely to this because it is an exclusive deal for you.
Christo knows you hire directors for films so he is prepared
to make you an offer.  The offer is contingent on you bringing
to the Metrodome 22 Panels of Plywood in the exact amount
of 11 sheets of Oak Plywood and 11 sheets of Maple plywood.
This is representative of the offense and the defense of a
football team.  Do you think you can handle that Zack?

Zack Mammond ( Zygi Wilf ) è What is Christo going to be using
the plywood for?

HACK MAMMOND è Right now that is none of your business Zack.
But the question was

I mean if you
can’t handle a simple request then it is pretty obvious why you
are having so much trouble with your stadium proposal. 

Back Mammond ( Adrian Peterson ) spoke up è Zack, what HACK
is asking is pretty straightforward.  Hey HACK, you tell Christo that
I will bring Eleven sheets of plywood and Sack ( Jared Allen ) will
bring Eleven sheets of plywood.  Mine will represent the offense
and Sack’s ( Jared Allen ) will represent the defense.

Sack Mammond ( Jared Allen ) è Yeah, Zack, you can count on me
to bring 11.  Now HACK, can you explain more about this National
Debt thing.  We pay a lot in taxes as it is as Vikings players. 

HACK MAMMOND è Yes you do Sack, but look at these 4400
Wounded Warriors.  What system are you teaching them that
will bring in the big bucks?

Sack Mammond ( Jared Allen ) è I’m not teaching them anything
but I get behind their causes and shine a light where needed.

Zack Mammond ( Zygi Wilf ) è We just want a stadium HACK.  Can
you help us out or not?

HACK MAMMOND took out a letter written by Christo Strom.  It was
written in red and it went like this:

Clearing his throat, HACK MAMMOND read aloud

MATTHEW 25: 1 Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened
unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to
meet the bridegroom.

25:2    And five of them were wise, and five were foolish.

HACK then folded the words written in red and turned to the
multitude assembled on the Metrodome field.

What Christo wrote to me were words that I spoke over
two thousand years ago.  They are as true today as they
were back then.  Christo is going to teach every woman
entrepreneur he comes in contact with how to become
part of the five that are wise.  Don’t worry about the
virgin part.  He will explain to you that EVERYONE is a virgin
as far as National Debt Training is concerned.  Just stay
tuned and you will make it!!!

END of the Mammond Series +++ Zack Mammond : Valhalla and Garden Hills

You will have to return for the next post  to learn about the
late great Walter Payton.  Next post will reveal what you need
to do to get started with national debt training and the steps
and words you need to know.  Keep it Simple Silly!

Respectfully in TRUTH,

Sole Owner of OrangeRace Card Angels facebook

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