Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Back Mammond : Adrian Peterson Tackles Mel Mammond

Back Mammond : Adrian Peterson Tackles Mel with Writchristo

Now where were we? Ah yes, for those assembled on the Metrodome
Field in Minneapolis Minnesota, these words coming from
Back Mammond è

Back Mammond ( Adrian Peterson ) spoke up è Who the hell
does HACK MAMMOND think he is?  Jesus Christ, where is

Descending down the Metrodome stairs after having been
busy doing his thing with social media, HACK MAMMOND
walked up to Back Mammond .  HACK had with him an
Orange Crown.  He then gave the Orange Crown to
Back Mammond and spoke to the crowd assembled.
Here are HACK’S WORDS :



Every one, take a knee.  I have hired 


to serve you free beer today.  You will be served
ALL DAY ( Adrian Peterson ) and at the end of the day,
Back Mammond ( Adrian Peterson ) you will be in no
shape to play football.  Am I making myself perfectly
clear here.  Come on everyone, isn’t that really what
you came to see.  You want ALL DAY Adrian to be just like you.
Mr. Mayor, RT Rybak, you don’t want the Vikings to leave
Minneapolis right? And Governor Dayton, you don’t want
to finance the Viking stadium without the help of Pull tabs,
which in reality is Gambling Addiction.  Notice the AD in
addiction?  And all the 4400 Wounded Warriors assembled
here, you just want people to recognize your sacrifice to
our great country right?  Well, guess what people? Free Beer
and Pull Tabs are the best Minneapolis Minnesota can
come up with!!! YA FN Whoo!

Back Mammond interrupted HACK MAMMOND’s speech  to
the multitude with this è 

HEY HACK, Sack said that you said,
that I , the great Back Mammond were going to be held
accountable for the words:


HACK MAMMOND got within a ½ inch of Back Mammond’s face
and spoke in the loudest voice EVER è




The crowd instantly gasped and shrieked because they had never
seen anyone talk to the great Adrian Peterson in this way, as if
HACK MAMMOND had authority. 

Back Mammond started to sweat a little but without hesitation, put
the Orange Crown on his head.  Slowly, blood started to trickle down
from the crown and over Back Mammond’s 28 Jersey.  He grimaced
in pain because it started to feel more like the weight of the world
than just an Orange Crown.  After two minutes and eight seconds,
Back Mammond could take no more.  He grabbed at the Orange
Crown and with one mighty heave, he threw the Orange Crown

It landed in the end zone.  From his own twenty yard line, he threw
the Orange Crown 80 Yards.  Those assembled on the Metrodome
Field will attest, Back Mammond let out a blood curdling scream.

And then it happened!  Who had just entered the Metrodome  but
Mel Mammond ( Mel Gibson ).  He was standing in the endzone
when the crown that Back Mammond had thrown landed at his feet. 
The funny thing was, no one assembled inside the Metrodome had
invited Mel.  It was here that all hell started to break loose.

Mel Mammond ( Mel Gibson ) loudly spoke, in a thick Scottish accent
like William Wallace è 

So the great
HACK MAMMOND is on the Metrodome Field cursing and swearing
and handing out FREE BEER.  Meanwhile, the great Mel Mammond
has gotten thrown under the bus because of you HACK MAMMOND.
Well, HACK, paybacks are a bitch aren’t they?  Did you bring your
Sword HACK? Are you ready to fight for freedom HACK?  Are you
ready to die today HACK?  Answer me HACK, are you ready to die?

After Mel Mammond’s tirade, HACK MAMMOND turned to Back
Mammond ( Adrian Peterson ), Sack Mammond  ( Jared Allen ),
and Zack Mammond ( Zygi Wilf ) and calmly uttered the immortal
words :


And as if a mighty Angel had just spoke, Back, Sack and Zack ran
toward Mel and gang tackled him in the end zone.  They threw a
potato sack that HACK MAMMOND had secretly given them and
put it over Mel Mammond’s head.  They then grabbed ten yards
worth of steel chains and tied it around Mel Mammond’s ankles
so he could not run away.  They carried Mel Mammond, kicking
and screaming and swearing, to the 50 yard line on the Metrodome

+++ ( this has been Part One of Back Mammond’s story of Redemption)
Stay tuned to find out what happens to the as yet untapped 44 kegs
of ice cold Minnesota Beer , and the roughly 4500 people gathered
on the Metrodome Field.  +++

Respectfully in TRUTH,

Sole Owner of OrangeRace Card Angels facebook

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